The Adventures of Hackerdom Ten Mutunhire, October 22, 2016August 10, 2022 The Adventures of Hackerdom, Routine 1 by The Infamous Hacker Tendai Mutunhire At last, we come to the weighty matter of the Metaphysics This men who are not novices have chanced to know Some politicians promise you Coffeescript before the election And then they switch and mudsling with JavaScript instead Tis little wonder the Fed’s rates can only go up, up like Stroustrup’s C++ Even when politicians know they cannot deliver Ruby and gems No, not in a thousand null dreams They are likely to sell you on fools gold and Smalltalk If a ruler in Africa is a corrupt Ada say he’s likely to be a dictator From such a one run, fast! and avoid the falling bytecode The Apple never falls far from the tree, C! Beware the obfuscation of parenthesis Especially if you spy a Lisp or hesitation in the man’s talk Townhalls and C# leave to beliebers and musicians Focus instead on the sincerity of the Lambda calculus The simplicity of Biryani haskell curry is antidote enough for the mind against these foos Fie, let not such a silly sound as F# recurse your Compojure If ever you are in Timbuktu, Remember me to a zoo Python there, where I loved a fair damosel once But Alas, she left me for her voodoo and ouija boards For her name, Scarcely remembered now I struggle to recall, was the delightful whimsical ‘Perl’ So took I to distilled concatenated, minified, liquified drink, Some call it punch, others the precious mountain dew, Ah ‘t delights me to quaff the prescient Elixir When on a sandy beach in Galicia I happen to repose Methinks it bestirs my soul like the famed Phoenix bird See also Conventional Wisdom Is WrongIf a masked Cowboy should happen you to accost, Fear not him, it is Erlang, harmless Erlang, Joust with him best as you can, Strike him in play, without killing his vivant process, But avoid his iron guns, the stinging Ejabberd and the mysterious Beam Now here’s the moral of the tale If ’tis bliss you seek, traveler, Ah, all travelled enough men know (Ask Stahlman or Raymond or Barski) That only can be found In the far-off storied Realm of Racket This is the first installment of an attempt to create a light-hearted “long-form epic” story of Hackerdom. Contributions are welcome. If you have suggestions, would like to contribute or comments, feel free to email me: hackishword@gmail.com I help solopreneurs get MORE PROFITABLE in WAY LESS TIME, grow and scale their one man businesses into time independent 7-8 figure machines that make money even when you’re asleep. Learn how in my Renegade Solopreneur Profits Bootcamp. Related novels Renegade Solopreneur scifi startups swigs tutorialswriting
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